“Unfortunately, I don’t have the bandwidth for a mentorship relationship right now.” “I’m not sure I can help.” “Why are we meeting again?” Those are just a few of the responses I’ve received in my quest to develop a broad range of mentors. However, I’ve learned that they are an inherent part of crafting a mentor network—and that the pain is worth it.
Since the beginning of my scientific training, fellow students and well-meaning career counselors encouraged me to seek multiple mentors to help me find my way. But, as a self-conscious Black woman in a predominantly white field and institution, I felt intimidated. I was filled with self-doubt, embarrassed by how much I didn’t know. How could I ask people to help me if I didn’t even know what I needed help with?
But during my second year of grad school, I was desperate. I felt I had no idea what I was doing, and I needed guidance from people who were wiser and more experienced. So I flailed about, attempting to develop a mentoring network. I adopted a “nothing ventured, nothing gained” mentality and embraced the awkwardness of reaching out.
Some of the responses were negative and discouraging—but not all were dead ends.
One contact led to an internship in industry, the career direction I envisioned at the time. When that experience left me thinking academia might be a better fit, another path of contacts led me to my current assistant professor position. One email at a time, one informational interview after another, I became comfortable, confident, and strategic in building my network of mentors.
To choose a career, I needed to do more than ‘follow my dream’
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