The idea of marriage often scares us. Especially, if you opt for arranged marriage, the whole journey of finding the right one can be a daunting task. For instance, if you do not put across the questions at the first meeting sensitively, you may be shown the door way before you even utter the word ‘marriage’.
Talking about the questions, it is not just the boys who need to be sensitive. It is the girl’s responsibility as well to ask the right set of questions to avoid embarrassment for both the parties involved. Here are the questions you must never to ask a guy in your first meeting for an arranged marriage.
Do you plan to live separately after marriage?
Most of the girls from nuclear families, wish to have a family structure, similar to what they have seen. Well, we are not asking you to change your preferences and compromise! However, no matter how rational your reasons may be, just, avoid it. Asking this question on the very first meeting might make you come across as a negative person. There are many indirect ways to know his preferences. So, just avoid it, to save yourself the tag of a home-breaker!
By the way, how much do you earn?
Money is important, but asking about the salary directly in the first meeting is outright insulting and offensive. A question like, “What are your future career plans?” can also give you a better insight of his professional front and your future stability with him. His salary is something that you will eventually learn about, so try to avoid asking it at the first go.
So, how many girlfriends did you have?
Just like you, your prospective groom may also have a past. But, not many will like to be questioned much about it, forget sharing the details. So, try to control the itch. Do not go overboard by asking intimate details about his past-flings, unless he himself is enterprising enough to tell the tale.
Are you a virgin?
Well, indeed a million dollar question, but this is not the right moment to seek those details! Control your horses! Remember, this is not a messenger chat, where you can ask anything to a stranger and get away with it. You are sitting in front of a person whose temperament and nature you hardly know. Just like girls, even boys find such questions an attack on their character. Moreover, if he asks you the same question, it might make you uncomfortable as well. But, yes, you must insist on a pre-marital medical check-up after the things are finalised and you are all set to marry him.
Shall we go for a date?
No matter how liberal and broad-minded men claim to be, they will never appreciate women popping the question of going out on a date on the first meeting itself. Especially, in an arranged marriage scenario, you tend to judge the person based on their initial behaviour. So, there are good chances of him thinking of you as too 'fast'. Simply, stick to the conservative norms and let him take the lead (at least on this matter) and not vice versa.