1.Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"

*Nobody stands up*

Teacher: "Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!"

*Little Johnny stands up* 

Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?" 

Little Johnny: "No... i just feel bad that you're standing alone..."

2. 3 drunk guys enterd a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk so he started the engine & turned it off again.

Then said, "We have reached your destination". The 1st guy gave him money & the 2nd guy said "Thank you".

The 3rd guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked thinking the 3rd drunk knew what he did. But then he asked "What was that for?".

The 3rd guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"

3.  Boy: The principal is so dumb!

Girl: Do you know who I am?

Boy: No...

Girl: I am the principal's daughter!

Boy: Do you know who I am?

Girl: No...

Boy: Good! *walks away*

4.    I was in in the public restroom 

I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice in the other stall: 

"Hi, how are you?" 

Me: (embarrassed) "Doin' fine!" 

Stall: "So what are you up to?" 

Me: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just sitting here." 

Stall: "Can I come over?" 

Me: (attitude) "No, I'm a little busy right now!!" 

Stall: "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!

5.  Sardar-why r all these people running?

Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.

Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r

others running?