1. My son wanted to know what it's like to be married. I told him to leave me alone and when he did I asked him why he was ignoring me.

2. A wife hangs up after about a half-hour on the phone. The husband is surprised, "Wow, that was quick - usually you girls are at it for two hours at least!" "Yeah, well, it was a wrong number.

3. A little boy looks at his mum at a wedding and says, “Mummy, why is the girl dressed all in white?”His mum answers, “The girls is called a bride and she is in white because she’s very happy and this is the happiest day of her life.” 

The boy nods and then says, “OK, and why is the boy all in black?”

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